Well, I had a long couple days of thinking. It was hard, and I had a few break downs, but I think I have done all the thinking I could. Through it all I have come down to several conclusions as to what I have to do to finally to move on.

No matter how long or how hard I push myself, there is always going to be a moment or incident where I fall back on old habits and end up getting hurt all over again. I will always get messed up and fall all the way back to square one. That is unless I get rid of square one completely.

So what if I feel alone? So what if I need someone to talk to and nobody is wiling to listen? This is my life and it's time I grow up and make the best of it. Just like I did before I had all those friends and when I found love. It's time I let it all go, just stop torturing myself with things that I can never change.

The only way I can do this, is if I leave dA.

I don't know if I will make a new account or maybe come back to here after I get through all my problems. All I know is I'm going to miss you all and I wish all my friends, ex's, and even those I have hurt and fought with in the past, all the luck and happiness in the world.

I just have a few things I like to say before I go.
To everyone around me, I will always be grateful and glad to have known you. Be happy and carefree for the rest of your lives. Hope to see you all again!

LeAnna, I'm sorry for whatever I did wrong. I know that I probably shouldn't have fought with you, but I was rather problematic back then. I hope you and David are happy and always deeply in love.

Sam, no matter how I care about you I know I can never really get close to you again. Be happy with your fiance and I hope you are getting better as well.

Tai, I don't seem to get why you did the things you did but for whatever reason, I hope you are happy with your new man and that you will at least not lie as much.

David, and anyone else from my past. I tried, but I really can't be connected to anyone from my past anymore. I doubt I can talk to anyone that is also connected to people that hurt me and/or that I hurt. So like with the rest, I wish you luck and happiness.

And last but by far not the least, Cassie... I love you, and I always will love you. You said you hope that my gf was perfect, but you are perfect. I can never be as happy as I was when I was with you. I don't care how far you are, or how much our ages differ. Love is love, and I found it in you. With that said, I also know that love is a two way street. If you weren't happy and chose not to tell me so I can help or to better understand how to let you go, well that's something we both have to live with. So good bye and never ever be sad again, okay?
Even in your darkest moment, just smile, for me.
You will always be my Evil Angel.

Okay, I'm gone.
Take care and I'll be seeing you!

P.S.
I'm unblocking everyone, so feel free to say what you want. I'll check this page for a few days.